Husdjur

Katten jamar i högan sky. I flera timmar har hon glott på oss med sina stora ögon. 'Äntligen äntligen har de fattat'. Fattat att det är helg och helg betyder FISK. Hur kan hon veta?
Ute regnar det, känns som en slags katarsis, en rening av allt. Idag är en bra dag. Katten jamar på för den där fisken måste ju koka först och det tar för lång tid. Hon vet, katten, samma visa varenda helg. Och ändå helt beroende av att vi förstår hur viktigt det är för henne.
Det handlar om kärlek förstås, att vilja någons bästa. Det har hon nog ingen koll på. Men hon tycker säkert att vi är bra husdjur.

Slowly going home

Soon I will return to my hometown in Sweden. But Athens and the view from my place was my home for one month. When you stay in a place for that long things changes around you. I was here by myself and maybe that contributed to that feeling. Things grow on you, you get familiar with your surroundings. You are forced to get out of your comfortzone and that is necessary for a person who wants to stay creative. But I recommend it to everyone. You grow. And especially if you go solo.

Athens and it hurts

Taking a walk and this is what you encounter every now and then. People suffer in Athens, refugees, homeless people and retired people as well. It hurts. I can't do anything but to show that people suffer. The economic crisis here in Greece isn't helping. Tourists walk around Syntagma, Plaka and Monastiraki as they always did. Spending money. I bought some napkins from an old man outside a church for 1 €. He looked really happy and that hurt.

Twins

We went to the Museum of Natural History once when I was eleven years old. It was the most exciting experience I ever had outside school. And the most exciting were the Siamese twins. I had no idea about what that was and studied them in the glassjar with formaline for a long long time. I understood they died a very long time ago, so I didn't feel sad. More curious.

A long long time passed, say like 45 years.
I wanted to show my wife this very special experience and we went there a couple of years ago. "No, the twins are no longer in the exhibition, for different reasons. Read: Not to upset people. Would you like to see them anyhow?" Did we, Hell yea, that's why we came in the first place. Don't know what happened after that more than we were led into a special room and there they were! Beautiful, just like I remembered.

Now it's decided from some politician with moral as high standards taste they have to go. Where, is my question? It could upset people! Of course! But if we never got upset, means we don't live, my dear.
Here is my contribution to them, the Siamese twins.

Happy Easter, Athenians!

Yes, this weekend the greek-orthodox church mourn the death of Jesus Christ and tonight at 00.00 celebrates the ressurection of Him. They have fasted for 40 days, which nowadays means no meat, no eggs, no milkproducts. But after midnight tonight they all eat grilled lamb, preferably a whole lamb to share. The restaurants are fully booked. And fireworks of course.
I spoke to a woman about how important  their tradition of Easter is, the most important actually. The kids get presents, new clothes and new shoes.
When I told her about how we celebrate, she was shocked. Well, it's all preference.
I'm not religious at all. But I can envy the strong tradition of doing something together like that. They go to church on Good Friday and at nine o'clock pm they go in processions from the churches and there are many churches.
And then there is the light, at midnight. Jesus is back! Everyone lits candles.

And since the crisis in economy here in Greece still is very obvious and a reality, I understand that it may be even more important.

And what do I do? I enjoy the sun that finally came to Athens, spending time on the huge terrace and enjoy being here. In my solitude.

Käraste, hur blev det sen?

Min käraste,
Vad vore jag utan dig? En liten lort, som Astrid sa.
Försöker vara människa. Och vad är det? Att leva från år noll tills det tar slut...?
Någonstans i mitten är jag och det är den svåraste biten. Att hitta mening där.
Man förstår ju nu att livet är ändligt. Jag visste alltid, men förstod inte innebörden i det. Sen förlorade man någon viktig och det blev glasklart.
Och vad händer sen? Ingen aning.
Men hur fortsätter man efter en krasch mitt i livet? Vilken väg ska man gå?
Vad är viktigast? Det är just det. Vad är viktigast?
Drömmarna har krympt med tiden för att man vet att tiden är begränsad. Måste dom bli mindre för det? Drömmarna. Eller har de krympt för att man blivit äldre? Helt naturligt?
Kanske svaren finns runt hörnet? Man måste bara ge lite mer. Kanske. Se det som finns alldeles intill. En vacker dag är allt borta. Ingen katt som jamar efter mat...hur jobbigt än det kan vara. Ingen mamma att gå promenader med längre. Kanske ingen varm fru bredvid en i sängen längre. Vad är då all strävan värd att försöka fylla livet med annat? När allt fanns framför en hela tiden? Svara, någon!

Some days...

...I don't go outside and walk around in my pajamas all day long. A day of waste...no the contrary. These days are the most creative, I'm in a bubble. Just staring out into nothing from the sofa. Suddenly ideas and solutions appear. It's a necessary state to be in. I don't want to be disturbed in my room. Only need a pen and some paper to write on. Doesn't look like much, doesn't make much sense by then, but this is work. From moments like this I find myself.

Not on Facebook

If you don't have Facebook, you don't exist? In 2019. Isn't that just so sad, so bad. I'm sure there are people like me, who just couldn't do it anymore. And even those that never started. How can I find you? Well, like I used to do I guess. I travelled. Met friends. Shared addresses. Shared beds. Shared lovers. Shared a smoke. Shared life.

Some courtesy, if I may

The Reviewer or the Gallery or the Museum or the Magazine smile back through the lines in their response to the request. Ah, there is a small strike of light!

"Please, please send us your new book, we would looove to see it! And of course blablablabla...blablablAAA!"...

Finally a nice response, I think, and with some courtesy. As it should goddamnit! Worked my ass off for this book, well my head as well. What's the difference, hey!?

Days pass, weeks, years. So much for that bullshitsmile that got my book for free. Hope it will bite your ass one day and then I'll just hum a little tune by Amy or Patti maybe...

At VOID Athens

I've had a bad cold for a couple of days and spent my time under a blanket most of the time. The weather, so far, in Athens didn't help. But it doesn't matter at all. This is Ulrika Walmark, a new friend, posing for me at VOID. What a great venue and very nice people. Check it out, VOID Athens. That is a long way from the cold and hard climate in Sweden for a photographer like myself. Very different. Warm. Friendly. Just what I needed.